I am Cristina Pisică, the aunt of the young man Alexandru-Daniel Huszti, with whom I participated in the Empathy Retreat in Sibiu. Being busy with various issues and activities, this camp was like a “breath of fresh air,” a new experience that took us (in a positive way) out of our usual routine. We didn’t know what it was about, but since we like challenges and new experiences, we signed up and didn’t regret it. In this camp, on the first day, we didn’t know anyone, but with the help of the organizers, we integrated into the group of participants. This is how we met friendly and open people willing to help.
Through the exercises we did with Alexandru, they showed us that despite the challenges faced by people with various disabilities, these challenges are also applicable to us, “normal” people. We discovered that we are often ignorant about many things and that, in fact, we know very little.
We always have something new to learn. We don’t even take 5 minutes a day to listen to ourselves and learn how to listen to those around us. We are all different! In people with disabilities, imperfections are more visible, just as their struggle to overcome social and physical barriers is more apparent. For us, whose imperfections are not visible, out of pride not to be seen as inferior to our “neighbors,” we often fail to recognize our own imperfections and prefer to make mistakes. We stumble from one mistake to another, lacking the courage to accept our limitations and weaknesses.
I really enjoyed this camp! I didn’t realize before that simple exercises, such as “the city covered in lava from a volcano” or “getting to know Sibiu,” as I explained to Alexandru, and putting myself in the shoes of people without sight, without hearing, or accompanying a person in a wheelchair, showed me how difficult and uncomfortable some urban works are. Works done merely for appearance and without responsibility, such as planting curbstones 25 cm high, broken cobblestone pavements, metal poles that were cut but not removed from the asphalt, leaving a stump a few centimeters high, stairs/ramps inaccessible to people with various disabilities, children, and to us in general! Office desks with high counters where short people or those in wheelchairs cannot reach. Metal panels with various information placed in parking areas at low heights, posing a danger to blind people, and so on.
I’m glad that during this retreat, Alexandru opened up more, made friends with the organizers and participants, learned to be more autonomous, gained confidence, had the courage to express his opinions, as best as he can, about things, and became more attentive to details.
Alexandru is a young man with Down syndrome who is involved in various sports and creative activities through the associations he is part of. The friendly group we met in the camp had a positive impact on him, which is why he still talks about it. When the camp ended, he didn’t want to go home, so I told him that we have a new exercise, the second part, “getting to know Sibiu,” which started with the Zoo Garden. From the entrance, Alexandru noticed that there were no lockers to leave your luggage (if you have a large bag). Visitors with large luggage who don’t have cars have to carry their bags with them. We saw several people in this situation. The ramp, which is designed to help people in wheelchairs and parents with small children, is so steep that it’s difficult to climb, and even when the weather is nice you have to be very careful when going downhill. I don’t want to imagine how it can be used when it snows.
In this retreat, I discovered that we had lost the ability to communicate, think freely, and express our positive/negative opinions about things. We often find it more convenient to accept the current situation, compare it to the past, and praise foreign cultures. If we had the courage to look at ourselves, we would see that what fascinates us when we go to other countries can also be found here, but we need to keep our eyes open, communicate with each other, set aside our pride, and have the courage to put our ideas into practice.
Exercises like the ones we did in the Empathy Retreat could be organized in small groups, within families, with friends, etc. For example, leaving our mobile phones at home and trying to explore our own town, discover public and tourist attractions, organize a competition where participants have to get from point A to point B, following signs or asking local residents for directions. I believe that such exercises can be used in schools, camps for children and adults, and gradually, society can mobilize and change for the better.
